Suicide is not an answer

Nothing will send you into a panic quicker than a call from your 14 year old nephew crying. 

My plan for the weekend was to kick my horrendous cold in the butt by spending most of the day napping on the couch with my box of Kleenex, a large glass of OJ and my warm fuzzy blanket.  I was in and out of sleep most of the Saturday and I was most definitely out of it when my phone started to ring in the early afternoon.  I don't think I was even recognizing what was being said for the first few minutes of the phone call, but as soon as I realized that my nephew was crying and very upset, I snapped awake immediately.  One of his friends committed suicide over the weekend. 

I know what he is feeling...because I had 3 friends in college also commit suicide.  But I never thought I would tell him about that time at such a young age.  I never thought I would have to console him about losing a friend at such a young age - at least not to suicide.  And what do you say about it??  It's senseless.  It's maddening.  It's devastating.  It's reckless.  It's....sad.

There is no shame in asking for help.  Yet when you are so far down, you sometimes don't know how to ask for help. I've been there, and all it took was a friend to say, "Call your counselor."  And I did. And I will. I have never been suicidal but I have dealt with depression (and I will again) so having someone say to me, "You are not yourself,"  made a huge difference in my life.  I'm not saying it's easy because it is certainly not.  But reaching out is a good thing. 

I don't have any answers.  I just wish I could take away my nephew's grief.  And the pain this young man was feeling.  And the anguish his parents and sister are left with. 

Suicide is not an answer.